Life in the Family of God
Two Marks of Christian Community
Aaron Lee | 1 Thess 5:12-18 | FCBCW Youth Worship | August 16, 2026
Introduction
How are Christians supposed to interact with each other?
In my work, we have clear rules and boundaries to follow in terms of how we are to interact with my bosses and my coworkers. At your school, you have clear rules and boundaries to follow in terms of how you are to interact with your teachers and your classmates.
How do we engage each other at church?
Context
In our passage today, the Apostle Paul asks and urges the church to act in specific ways:
12 We ask you, brothers… 14 And we urge you, brothers… (1 Thessalonians 5:12-18)
1. Appreciate and esteem your pastors
The first mark of Christian community is that we appreciate and esteem our pastors:
12 We ask you, brothers, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you, 13 and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves. (1 Thessalonians 5:12-13)
Explanation
Christians are to love their pastors.
Pastors are people who do the Lord’s work, those who preach from the Bible, and are specifically called and committed, responsible and authorized to the task of shepherding souls. Another name for these types of people are elders – and this doesn’t mean their age, but it’s talking about their spiritual maturity and guidance. In a world of celebrity pastors, Paul reminds us that our pastors should be real people who take part in our lives.
Paul describes our pastors, our church leaders. He says that they labor among you, they work hard, and are over you in the Lord, admonishing you. They are leaders in the Lord’s work – they lead you in the Lord. They have charge over you, giving you spiritual guidance, care, and instruction. There is a sense where we don’t blindly follow anyone who calls themselves a pastor – they should be proven by their work.
The text says to respect them, and this doesn’t mean we keep them at a distance – it means we honor them, acknowledge them, recognize them. The word appreciate gives us the correct feel. We are also to esteem our church leaders, and esteem means to hold them in high regard, to think good of them. And the reason Paul gives is not necessarily because of who they are as people, but it’s because of the work that they do – the work of shepherding.
To be sure, those who teach the Bible – the distinctive responsibility of our pastors and preachers – will be judged with greater strictness (James 3:1). It’s right to obey and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over our souls, and will have to give an account to God – we would want them to lead us with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to us (Hebrews 13:17).
All of that said, we are to love our pastors. Love can be an ambiguous word, so Paul gives us a great practical application – we are to live at peace with our leaders.
Application
So, will you live in peace with your pastors?
Living at peace does not mean doing everything your pastor says. Living at peace does not mean you are not allowed to ask questions. What it does mean, is that you see how God has placed these people in your life and allow them to shepherd your soul with the staff of Scripture.
On a practical level, living at peace means partnering together with your pastors to fulfill the gospel mission. We are to make disciples, and pastors are glad when their people want to be discipled and help disciple others. This means you make yourself available, you volunteer, you help where it is needed. You commit and you follow through. You don’t hide or make things difficult but you are open and willing to work together. This is what it means to live in peace with your pastors.
Let me give you an illustration and example from my own life. I’ve been leading worship for a long time – since I was a youth. Admittedly, I was prone to being irreverent in musical worship. I remember a gentle word of correction from one of my youth pastors, Jerry Hwang, who helped me get back on track with God’s holiness. What I appreciated most was that he didn’t want me to stop serving, he just wanted to guide me along to something that was more biblically balanced as to who God was. I took it to heart, and it has stuck to me to this day.
You can start applying this today by being present for your pastors. Notice, listen, and communicate with your pastors. Appreciate your pastors by listening to sermons and taking notes. You can communicate by asking questions about the Bible and how to obey God in your life – and this esteems your pastors by allowing them to speak into your life. Get to know them and let them know you. Your pastors are people, and just like anyone else they want to be encouraged in the work, the ministry that they do. We can come alongside them to appreciate and esteem them.
If you think back, you’ll remember pastors who have left an impact on your life. Like Pastor Jon Szeto, who came alongside to walk with me and Jess during our dating. And Pastor Steve Loo who believed and invested in me as a leader.
Living at peace with your pastors shows unity to the watching world. In a world where distrust and defiance are the norm, Christians shine as lights, showing what Jesus means to us and how he has changed us.
2. Admonish and encourage God’s people
The second mark of Christian community is that we admonish and encourage God’s people:
14 And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. 15 See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. (1 Thessalonians 5:14-15)
Explanation
Christians are to love God’s people.
God’s people are a global people, but we are called to love those especially in our local church. There’s a point of belonging here – we need to know each other in the church. In a world of online community, the Bible tells us that the local church consists of real people having human interactions and relationships in person, living in real life together.
Notice the different types of people Paul places in the church – those who are idle, fainthearted, and the weak. These types of people are all included in the family of God. There is a sense where we’re reminded that the church is made up of all different types of people – it is not an institution for the religious elite. It is for broken sinners in need of Jesus our Savior.
To admonish means to warn. We are to warn those who are idle – those who are lazy, unruly, disrupting the ministries of the church. We are all expected to participate in the life of the church. We are to encourage the fainthearted – those who are disheartened and maybe feeling timid, comforting those who are discouraged. We are to help and take care of those who are weak in faith, and be patient with everyone, especially as we expect persecution and anticipate the Lord’s judgment and return. Our warnings and encouragements are acts of love that lead each other back to the Lord.
To be sure, we are to let love be genuine (Romans 12:9) – not based on emotions, like loving only when we feel like it, but our love should be consistent, grounded in who we are in God. We should not waste the limited opportunities we have in this life to do good to everyone – but especially to those who know and love the Lord (Galatians 6:10).
All of that said, we are to love God’s people. Again, Paul makes this practical, telling us to pursue what is good.
Application
So, will you pursue what is good?
Pursuing what is good does not mean we only do good to people who do good to us. What it does mean, is that you try, you strive, you actively seek after doing good to others – no matter what they have done to you.
On a practical level, this means asking for forgiveness and seeking reconciliation when wronged. It means going out of our way to notice and reach out to those who are alone or hurting. It means asking questions and being open to share our lives together.
Let me give you an illustration and example from my own life. I have a friend who is going through a difficult season, and I said something insensitive – it was along the lines of “oh you should trust God’s plan for your life.” And while this is true, I believe I said it in a rude way. I apologized to my friend, and she forgave me quickly and we moved on. I was so grateful that she chose to pursue what is good for us as friends.
You can start applying this today by being present for God’s people. Notice, listen, and communicate with your peers. Appreciate the people here at church by listening to what others have to say in small groups or in Sunday School. You can communicate by speaking up in small groups and praying for others – and this encourages each other as we seek to grow together. And find ways to connect outside of church. The people here at church are individuals. We all have our own joys and sufferings, victories and trials. When a parent gets cancer, when someone ipmortant has passed away, when you can tell your friend is sad, when someone is struggling at home, when a friend group is fighting – God is good, Christ is king, the Holy Spirit is our helper, nothing can separate us from God’s love, and we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. We can come alongside each other to admonish and encourage.
If you look around, you’ll see more of this in your life. Like the men in my small group who push me to be good husbands, fathers, men of God. And the young people I serve in youth worship, as you are an example to me and to others.
Pursuing what is good shows beauty to a watching world. In a world where vitriol and violence are the norm, Christians shine as lights, showing what Jesus means to us and how he has changed us.
The Gospel
16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
Rejoice, pray, give thanks. These are words of hope. And these commands to stay hopeful are for those for you who belong to Christ Jesus, for those who are in Christ Jesus, for you who are in Christ Jesus. The church, the pastors and the people, are truly God’s gift in our lives.
Conclusion
How are Christians supposed to interact with each other?
The church is not a workplace. The church is not a school. The church is a family.
12 We ask you, brothers… 14 And we urge you, brothers… (1 Thessalonians 5:12-14)
The apostle Paul talks about us as a family. When he asks and encourages, he addresses us as brothers. We can’t forget that we are the family of God. Appreciating and esteeming our pastors, admonishing and encouraging God’s people. My brothers and sisters, the Lord has not left us to live life alone. In his sovereignty, he has placed us here together for a reason: We do our best to love each other – and we wait for the Lord’s return, when our love will be perfected, and our joy will be complete.
Big Idea
The family of God is marked by love for their pastors and God’s people.
Prayer Poem
I love the Lord, I love his church
I love how Jesus came to serve
And wash his bride, to give her worth
To give her grace that’s undeserved
To make her whole, to make her clean
To give her breath, to make her sing
To give her joy, to give her peace
To give her hope, to be her king
He gave her shepherds tasked to care
And tasked to teach, and tasked to bear
The burdens of his ministry
Still, God’s own Word does everything
And all God’s children share their lives
And learn to be a sacrifice
A family, an offering poured
A people pleasing to the Lord
I love the Lord, I love his church
I love how Jesus came to serve
And wash his bride, to give her worth
To give her grace that’s undeserved
To make her whole, to make her clean
To give her breath, to make her sing
To give her joy, to give her peace
To give her hope, to be her king
References
The ESV Expository Commentary by Crossway
The ESV Study Bible by Crossway
The Gospel Coalition Bible Commentary on 1 Thessalonians by David W. Chapman
Discussion Questions
Is there a pastor or church member who has left an impact on your life?
What are areas that you can love and serve the pastors and people in your church?